Saturday, December 06, 2008
I wonder what is happening to me. I don't feel well and then I keep thinking, maybe I can never catch up to you. The one person that is so distant and so close to me at the same time. Hahaha Its so weird. Its not like we even talked b4. And I wouldn't want to, for fear that u will spoil the perfect impression I have of you. On the other hand, I hate the perfectness. I want to smash it. Its a weird source of motivation for me hahahahCall it envy. X_XMet up with jinbo and anna yesterday. Ate sushi tei and then we drank at a bar.Jin's treat. It was great seeing them but I just felt so tired. Esp after the drinks..likes there is something I need to do and I have not been doing it right. But what?? My mind is very blur.Sang KTV with my sis n her frd today.Collected our camera.walked and walked. Didn't sleep well yesterday. My mind is just buzzing with dialogues...all the things that happened. And why I just have to butt in? I will never know..it just feels like the right thing to do. Why don't people appreciate others more? Why don't ppl listen to me? Must I be great so that ppl will listen to me? If that is the case. Then I want to be so high up that I can't hear anything. Or so powerful that I can shut them all up. But, I don't regret butting in. Its nice to follow your heart once in a while...hehahah hrum. I wonder when I can be free from all troubles. And live my precious life to the fullest. And be happy all day! :) That day will only arrive when I am perfect. :)Life is so SHORT!!! Omg, maybe I am emo cause I am turning 20. I haven accomplished anything yet! I don't like the fact that my decades of memory can turn into dust..that everything is slipping away.I want a time-turner!! I will go back to my sec 3 days..the best damm days of my life. :)Eyyyy what is wrong with me? I haven even started and I am feeling scared. Boo to life.lalala btw I did another 2 drawings again. Time passes well when I am drawing. Its like there is only the picutre and me and nth else on earth. Its so intense..so FIERCE. HAHA..my heart thumps at the prospect of a perfect picture..Art is amazing.. cause you don't need the whole world to appreciate it. If there is one person who appreciates it, then its worth all the trouble. Cheers to life. :)
