Spongecakes.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

i just reached home from my tt traning. i am totally depressed now.. i lost my passion in tt..i just cant get any enjoyment from training..table tennis has always been with me..i miss my team mates in nas. last yr was the best..won 2nd in east zone n top 8 in nationals..beat gan eng seng.. =)..everyone worked so hard...i love those days back then.

i loved going for training...but now i hate it..i dont hate the ppl there...i just..i dono y i just cant enjoy..maybe its the teacher..cause i dont like him..n i have no frds there..exp for jy..n the team is really not strong at all...i just cant lift my sprits up..no coach to train them..tp's table tennis will forever remain weak. nth to look forward to during comeptition...it is a sure lose situation...the players there are really weak....i am not saying i am very gd or something..but argh!!they just cant make it..i can trash them so easily...it is not their weakness that i loathe..i can see they are working hard..but something is lacking....maybe because i haf always been in a respectable team.. i just dono y i am so sad there..

kept thinking bot my frds...i felt so lonely in sch..i just cant bond with ppl...i am not a very sociable person..i dont initiate talks...i cant get out of my shell in class..haik..ppl just dont understand me..i dont feel comfortable in my class..

nearly cried on my way back home.. but it is so hard to control the tears..so i just let it all out after alighting from the bus. reached home n both my parents opened the door...mum asked me what happened...n they tot i had an argument with my table tennis teacher in charge..cause i complained bot him to my parents b4. but NOOO...i didnt even talk to him today..he will never hire a coach..he will haunt tp's tt team forever..he is a curse. then my stupid father started talking his rubbish again..saying that i am what n what..cant stand his tone...my parents dont understand me at all...no one understands me..i have to comfort myself everytime..i cant tell them my worries..i cant tell them anything..thats y i will avoid letting them see me cry.

i feel so shitified..is tp making my life that bored n depressed?? should i love what i am in rather then love what i like? ? should haf went mj..stupid teacher called me so late..tt teachers in charge are all weidos. btw today's oratorical? contest was great...tp's best event so far...

next mon having competition..sian..sure lose..the only thing i am looking forward to is seeing pearlin again.. :P ..pearlin my best frd....ey pearlin are u readin this? i want to tell u that u are my best frd n hope that our frdship will be forever.. :) thanks for being my frd n making my life in nas great! love u~ haha

Thursday, March 23, 2006

what the hell...i cant borrow MOLE CONCEPT notes from anyone...everyone's MOLE CONCEPT notes are made of gold.

pissed..now i cant do my hw..cause i DONO how to do..the questions are so bloody sucky..I NEED EXAMPLES!!!!!!!!!!EXAMPLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tpj life nth much...but i hate mondays...got table tennis training...omg..soooo sian..no coach..then got cunning teacher in charge...players there not gd..i can only play with jy..i miss nas table tenins...sad...

06s27..my class...haik..ppl still alright..but i really feel damn lost during the first 3 days...no frds..i dont really talk to ppl much..n my looks ar..like those nerd or proud ppl..who wants to be my frd??? sad..i miss 4r3..sad..I REALLY MISS 4R3!!

guohao just saved me by sending me the mole concept ppt..

btw today no chi lesson..go lt4 watch movie.."gua sha"(chinese) erm..nice show..LOL very funny..but actually i thik the teacher in charge of us more funny..hahaah

then today the juniors lost n cant get into top 8..n today i fogot to bring my keys out...need to sit outside my house like a dog..haha..soo sian leh..then i very tired..so i slept on the floor..HAHAHA..its not that weird..cauase my floor got only 3 units...the one outside the lift owned by china ppl..they haven moved in yet..the 2nd one..corridor..owned by taiwan ppl..then my house at the corner...lol so have lots of private space..hehe..then i just slept lo...but what the hell!!the collect newspaper de person came n saw me half asleep on the floor....OMG!! so paiseh..she smiled at me sia..omg then i sleep until so ugly...argh!!!..waited for 1hr30 min then my mun came home from work n saved me...lol..

sick of jc life already...but i will work hard for my As..haha my learning journey going to end soon..a few more yrs n...........haha....so need to work hard.. =P oh ya...btw i joined the first-aid club..HAHAA

PS: i MISS NAS!! I MISS MY FRDS!!I I MISS 4R3!!!! i want to turn back time..

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

went escape on monday with pearlin,pricilla,chethong,nick,jeremy

entrance fees only $4..thats y we went. somemore still got free entrance tix after we left..haha can go again

first we went to the haunted house....i tot it was like those super stupid things..but omg its WAS freaky..i was scared because i tot someone inside would suddenly come out n scare us. but heng ar it nv happened..chethong led the way in..haha poor him..need to help us navigate..pearlin after him n then me, pricilla n jeremy..lol i accidentally stepped onto pearlin's slippers n she nearly fell down n i accidentally scratched her..sorry pearlin!

next we went for the..erm..wet games? haha the go high up then come down n splash de...lol my first time playing leh..scary..one boat can sit 2..so i sat with pricilla, pearlin with chet, nick with jeremy. i sat in the front cause sit at the back will get wetter..the going up part was scary la..but it was damn shoik! haha me n pricilla shouted tpjc as we went down.. cause tat stupid pear n chet kept shouting mj cheer.

then we went for the games..$10 for 6 games..omg so exp loh..but we still played la..share the cost..so $5 for 3 games..haha won 1 stupid dexter toy by playing a "make u feel useless game"..so useless sia..waste my money..i love that horsey game! haha i want the green colour crocodile toy!!!!! haik..nvm next time go back n play again.

then we played viking..i sat with pearlin in the first row..haha heng ar i nv sit at the back...the first row already scary for me..my heart cannot take it man. hah but i still shouted la..forgot waht i shout le..should be something bot tpjc again haha

next..go-kart..sian sia..i last to come back. got one stupid girl from behind overtook me...she driving sooo recklessly..i tot she going to crash..should go n ram her instead of braking..erm.. haha..just jk..i very kind de.

then we played our last game..flipper..from far look super scary sia..but then it was sooo fun! haha flip n flip~ muahah...it was so fun until we played it twice..one cup? can sit 4..one seat to 2 person..i sat with pearlin for the first round..with chethong n pricilla in the same cup. the 2nd round pearlin with chethong n me with pricilla..but still in the same cup..dono y this time the stupid cup keep spinning..ahhah i thik should be pearlin n chet hong too heavy.

after all those games..we went downtown east foodcourt n ate our dinner..then i took bus 3 n went home.. :)

i had lectures for the whole wk..lol not that boring..hah hope i will prosper in tpjc..looking forward to the lecture on fri..nite~

Thursday, March 02, 2006

i am sad now.

tml is the posting. tml i can see which sch i got in. tml is the day again where frds laugh n i cry.

maybe i wont cry tml..cause i am now.

y am i so stupid? i can nv score well..i can nv produce any gd results. every time i haf to cry. y do i always stumble at the crucial moment??? PSLE, olevel..i cant even make my parents proud. i have to make ppl around me sad again. i have to make myself sad again. its like everything is pointless. what i do will always end up the same.

i cant even tell my frds my score, i dont even haf the courage to tell them. i am sick n tired of my life.

been hiding my feelings all along, now the pain is coming back to me at full force. i dont want to cry. i hate crying n i hate to let ppl see me cry. maybe i am too proud, i dont want ppl to know that i am really the stupid pig. maybe thats y i didnt really cry on that day, n will nv in front of my frds.

i want to remain optimistic n i will. once in a while i just haf to let it all out. so pls just let me be in the pathetic state now n dont reply anything to this post. ty